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Smith et al.  sent us a pre-submission some 
time ago. Told us they want to publish very 
soon.

2
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So we said send it to us quickly then

3
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We are a very fast journal to publish in

4
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So they sent us the manuscript two days later 
we and sent it to the reviewers

5
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But one of the reviewers never replied

6
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And we totally forgot

7
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For 2 months

8
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And they didn't even dare to ask

9
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Stupid

10
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So we emailed them that we have to look for 
another reviewer, because it's hard to get 
people to work for free

11
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And we told them it's the fault of the other 
scientists

12
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Because scientists have to review for free 
for a multi-million dollar publishing industry

13
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And the scientific community is okay with 
this

14
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They say that's just how it works, how it's 
always been

15
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And then

16
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And then we still charge them, if they want 
to read papers from our journal

17
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And if they want to publish they have to 
pay a shitload of money for it

18
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They have to apply for grants to pay our 
salary

19
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Anyway, after 2 months Smith et al. emailed 
us and we sent the manuscript to another 
reviewer

20
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And we transferred them to a lower impact 
journal of ours

21
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The reviewers weren't satisified

22
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Proposed a ton of experiments

23
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Totally unfeasible for a small group

24
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And then another group published something 
similar in an open source journal

25
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They didn't even submit it to a preprint 
server so nobody knows they were first