1
00:00:00,100 --> 00:00:04,900
Boss, the vehicle management plan has arrived 
from the Exec...after a wait of three and 
a half years.

2
00:00:05,200 --> 00:00:07,400
It's about to be amended again of course, 
because Wyre Forest are complaining...

3
00:00:09,000 --> 00:00:10,700
...that there's not enough pictures.

4
00:00:11,200 --> 00:00:16,300
So we've had to find another wall to bang 
our heads against and nobody can agree who'll 
build it.

5
00:00:17,600 --> 00:00:20,300
Newport can build the wall.  When do we get 
the ISU?

6
00:00:25,000 --> 00:00:28,700
Well, Boss...[HESITATION]...shit...

7
00:00:30,000 --> 00:00:40,400
Shit happened and Wyre Forest are keeping 
the ISU as they threatened to mutiny and 
keel haul the Exec from junction 6 southbound.

8
00:00:53,800 --> 00:01:00,300
Any crew who haven't completed the five miler 
of death, please leave before D4H reminds 
you.

9
00:01:12,700 --> 00:01:14,400
WHAT THE SWARFEGA LUBED FUCK?!

10
00:01:14,700 --> 00:01:18,700
Those Brummie chimps only deploy the fucking 
thing to the rowing club twice a year!

11
00:01:18,800 --> 00:01:24,700
Half the time we end up translating what's 
said on the comms and it's still like listening 
to Goofy getting a handjob from an Oompah 
Loompah.

12
00:01:24,800 --> 00:01:27,900
Which pillock made that call?

13
00:01:29,100 --> 00:01:35,100
How many times have we dragged that Ford 
Ferry to the Afterlife up the Mordorway to 
go assist those ungrateful bastards?

14
00:01:35,200 --> 00:01:40,500
Only to find out we're just there to watch 
the real bloody heroes rock out all their 
funeral bucket  sponsored kit?

15
00:01:40,600 --> 00:01:43,000
Boss, we cannot compete with a quad mounted 
kayak launcher in Battenberg.

16
00:01:43,100 --> 00:01:46,100
It's fucking mental mate! Stark fucking mental!

17
00:01:46,200 --> 00:01:48,200
Boss, calm the fuck down.

18
00:01:48,300 --> 00:01:51,800
I would if the Exec had approved the purchase 
order for more crayons instead of boats.

19
00:01:51,900 --> 00:02:04,000
This isn't Sharkness...  Bunch of smartarses 
with a small army of crew at their disposal 
for those fucking bucket collections and 
getting the local Women's Insitute horny 
for lifeboats once again.

20
00:02:04,100 --> 00:02:08,900
All we wanted was a money magnet to match 
other teams...

21
00:02:09,000 --> 00:02:16,500
...just something that was less likely to 
kill us on the drive there and the ability 
to open a door without being hit by a kit 
avalanche.

22
00:02:17,600 --> 00:02:23,000
Do they want us to deploy on e-scooters with 
16 on tow?

23
00:02:26,600 --> 00:02:31,700
My lumbar can't take another land rovercoaster.

24
00:02:31,800 --> 00:02:38,700
I'm on so much co-codamol I've travelled 
farther into space than that Amazon wanker.

25
00:02:40,800 --> 00:02:42,400
It's bollocks.

26
00:02:42,500 --> 00:02:48,900
It's bad enough that we've got crew selling 
themselves on the High Street without ripping 
away their prospects of getting control of 
the oversized playstation those bastards 
are clinging to.

27
00:02:49,000 --> 00:02:53,800
As for the landies, it would be nice to drive 
something with a safety rating from this 
century.

28
00:02:53,900 --> 00:02:57,100
And that doesn't handle like a drunk priest.

29
00:02:57,200 --> 00:03:00,100
With air conditioning, my god, air conditioning!

30
00:03:00,200 --> 00:03:02,700
My crack is wetter than an otter's pocket 
after a run to fucking Worcester...

31
00:03:05,300 --> 00:03:09,000
Don't cry - he's not fucking Worcester.

32
00:03:14,000 --> 00:03:16,700
I don't get it.

33
00:03:19,000 --> 00:03:23,900
It's like we're the Hobbits between Wyre 
Forest's incoherent Orks and Beachley's emasculated 
Elves.

34
00:03:25,000 --> 00:03:28,800
...grips my shit.

35
00:03:31,300 --> 00:03:33,700
The pricks can do one.

36
00:03:39,900 --> 00:03:48,800
Tell the crew to start panic buying fuel 
whenever we deploy North or South and drain 
all the local gas stations.

37
00:03:54,000 --> 00:03:58,000
And all the bog roll.