1
00:00:01,200 --> 00:00:06,700
Number ONE! We are getting reports of a man 
named Merlin. Weird fellow apparently can 
suck himself off.

2
00:00:06,800 --> 00:00:11,600
His reportcards show less than desirable 
performance in Warzone.

3
00:00:11,700 --> 00:00:16,500
However he has pumped curry in a hurry. But 
got a suprise finger in he ass from the maharadjah.

4
00:00:16,600 --> 00:00:21,400
Went to prison for removing said finger. 
Got a motorcycle and a serious SUV.

5
00:00:21,500 --> 00:00:26,300
Then used a tractor to pull the image of 
fingers out of the butt.

6
00:00:26,400 --> 00:00:31,200
Merlins ex told me in indian, he was super 
calm, so calm

7
00:00:31,300 --> 00:00:36,100
He apparently peed himself before making 
sweet sweet love to my virgin bride to be

8
00:00:36,200 --> 00:00:41,000
Yes my bride if virginal still, my parents 
told so

9
00:00:41,100 --> 00:00:45,900
69 she would never do with penis! Merlin 
apparently you caressed her thighs... She 
told me so and i believe her

10
00:00:46,000 --> 00:00:49,900
So haha jokes on you, indian number one!