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This is a bird feeder,

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and everything you see surrounding me in 
my yard

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is an attempt to protect it

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from four theiving squirrels.

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If they want the bird seed and the lifetime 
supply of walnuts in this bank vault,

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they'll first need to pass through my nine-part 
obstacle course.

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By design it's extrememly challenging;

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It's meant to test their mental limits

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and their physical limits.

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I help back no punches,

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but I have to admit in hindsight,

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I once again completely underestimated my 
adversary.

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And truthfully, I'd never thought I'd be 
that crazy guy in the neighborhood obsessing 
over the squirrels.

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But they started it first

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when they would constantly pillage the bird 
seed

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from any bird feeder I put up about a year 
ago.

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That lead to me defending it with an obstacle 
course

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which they handedly defeated.

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And so after a year of ruminating on how 
to avenge  that L

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with a majorly improved version,

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and then 2 months of planning,

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my buddy John and I got together

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for a 20 second build montage.

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[MONTAGE NOISES, i.e, sawblade, paint-can 
ASMR, etc.]

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Here are the basic elements:

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For starters, here's their favored bird feeder 
at the end of the course.

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It is sitting atop Fort Knuts, the most secure 
walnut vault in the western United States.

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Now since birds can fly, they can come and 
go as they please

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and eat all the food they want.

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But the only way for the squirrels to make 
it right here

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is by surviving

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my nine-part grueling obstacle course.

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Which all starts right here, climbing up 
the pole, to this platform, is the single 
gateway to enter the course.

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Every other pole you see has some kind of 
counter-measure

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to keep the squirrel from just climbing up 
and then entering the course halfway through.

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And so the first challenge is this casino,

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which may seem like an odd choice,

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until you realise that as we were building 
the course, we also built them little squirrel 
houses.

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So we put them up in a couple different trees

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and after a few days, it looked like they 
actually made some renovations.

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So I went to take a closer look.