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Sir, as at July 9, 2021, we have reports 
of an outbreak of the Delta Variant of COVID-19 
in the suburbs of Sydney.

2
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Hotspots have been detected in Bondi, Liverpool, 
Balmain, Bankstown and Fairfield.

3
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There are also reports the virus could spread 
to other neighbourhoods in the metro area.

4
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If left unchecked, it could make it to other 
state captials by the end of the week.

5
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That’s OK – our vaccination numbers should 
be high enough to avoid a full-scale lockdown.

6
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My lord...

7
00:00:26,700 --> 00:00:28,500
Sir...

8
00:00:30,800 --> 00:00:33,200
Sir, we’ve only managed to fully vaccinate 
8% of our population to date.

9
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Sydney – will be locked down immediately.

10
00:00:52,600 --> 00:00:58,300
Anyone who can work from home, leave the 
room.

11
00:01:12,800 --> 00:01:15,000
How did we let this happen?

12
00:01:15,100 --> 00:01:17,900
Rampant community spread?

13
00:01:18,400 --> 00:01:24,800
Scotty and his cronies have been busy patting 
themselves on the back…

14
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…thinking they managed to complete the job 
simply by keeping foreigners out of the country 
and destroying people’s economic livelihoods.

15
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We are a country of immigrant heritage – 
many of us still have extended family living 
abroad!

16
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Sir, the inbound quota has been successful 
at keeping the virus outside the country.

17
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We’ve been blocking our own citizens from 
returning to the country!  What are we, Nazi 
Germany?

18
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The lockdowns have also been successful at 
suppressing the spread of the virus.

19
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Turning our cities into open-air prisons 
at the drop of a hat is not a viable long-term 
solution!

20
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The vaccine is the answer!

21
00:01:55,900 --> 00:02:00,700
I get it that we tried to develop a domestic 
solution to the supply problem.

22
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Vaccine politics is a very real thing that 
could have heavily limited imports.

23
00:02:05,700 --> 00:02:10,500
But unless we were prepared to spend $10 
billion on a solution, like the Americans 
did...

24
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…development was always going to be an uphill 
battle.

25
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Scotty from Marketing had the same opportunity 
to strike deals with Pfizer and Moderna...

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...comparable to the European Union and Canada, 
who have now vaccinated 35-45% of their populations.

27
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We’ve managed to keep a lot of people safe 
and healthy to date.

28
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And I’ve enjoyed the three relaxed beach 
trips to Forster...

29
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...in lieu of taking the kids to Disneyland.

30
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Dammit!

31
00:02:42,600 --> 00:02:48,000
Even those Canadians has managed to fully 
vaccinate a greater share of its population 
than us.

32
00:02:48,100 --> 00:02:52,900
The Calgarians are getting wasted at the 
Stampede as we speak, dancing to Achy Breaky 
Heart

33
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Daring others to eat prairie oysters and 
the proverbial rat-on-a-stick.

34
00:02:59,600 --> 00:03:02,800
Their premier is even promoting this season 
as the Best Summer Ever™!

35
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It’s OK – they’ll still have to deal with 
-30°C weather this winter.

36
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Oh well, it looks like we are heading into 
a lockdown.

37
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There’s not much we can do for the time being.

38
00:03:30,600 --> 00:03:34,200
Except wait it out and sign up for the vaccine 
when we can.

39
00:03:41,100 --> 00:03:50,700
On the upside, I could always direct the 
avocado toast budget towards a new Peloton 
bike.